Me? Here hare here? Hairs are your aerials. Much more of this and I'm going to apply for meals on wheels. These eels here are for his pot. Listen, Withnail, it's a stinker. Here grows the plant Assidos, which, when worn by any one, protects him from the evil spirit, forcing it to state its business and name; consequently the foul spirits keep out of the way there. So, there's this judge sitting there in a cape like fucking Batman with this really rather far-out looking hat. Politics, man. Little tarts, they love it! It features Paul Heller as producer, Lord David Dundas, and Rick Wentworth in charge of musical score, and Peter Hannan as head of cinematography. Withnail: Sulking up the hill. To tutor it in the ways of righteousness, and procure some uncontaminated urine. Withnail freezes in terror with a mouthful of pie]. [holding up a pill] Have you been away? Withnail: And that's why you mustn't hold back, let it ruin your youth as I nearly did over Eric. The only people he converses with are his clients, and occasionally the police. I'm a trained actor reduced to the status of a bum. [extends arm with umbrella straight up to sky]. Prostitutes for the bees. Marwood: Withnail: He's so mauve, we don't know what he's planning! Withnail: Get that damned little swine out of here! Offer him yourself. Danny: Because I don't advise it. *Aaaaarggghhhh*! Withnail and I is a TV program that first aired in 1970 . Much more of this and I'm going to apply for meals on wheels. You love him. How dare you. Withnail: Oh, bollocks to the Wellingtons. Alas I have little more than vintage wine and memories. Danny: We'll buy this place and have it knocked down! No! Chin-chin. It's got to warm up. [shouts out of the car window at a man standing on the pavement]. You will make it low. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts . I mean to have you even if it must be burglary. Listen to me, listen to me! Marwood: I know how you feel and how difficult it is. Withnail: 1 likes. Withnail is walking him to the station in the heavy rain, they stop and look at each other. Right, you fucker, I'm going to do the washing up! 4 Mar. Monty: If you don't remember the sixties, don't worry neither did they. It is called a Camberwell Carrot. [after coming out of a field, Withnail hasn't closed the gate properly, and a bull walks through it. Start shouting. Bastard asked me to understudy Konstantin in The Seagull. This is a court, man. Tea Shop Proprietor: Withnail: Withnail: Marwood: I would say. If you have any question or suggestion then just comment below or contact us. I'm starving. Don't vent spleen on me, I'm in the same boat! Haven't seen Gielgud down the labour exchange! Danny: You're looking very beautiful, man. Where's the aspirins? I feel like a pig shat in my head! Black puddings are no good to us. [a live chicken is standing on the table]. Oh, my boys, my boys, we're at the end of an age. I think a drink, don't you? Any minute now he's going to rush out and get into his tights. What a piece of work is a man! "Here. It'll pass. Withnail: We're doing a feature for Country Life. You merely imagined it. I'm not having this shag sack insulting me! We'll have another pair of large scotches. And how dare you tell him I love you?! Having said that, I now intend to leave for London. I don't know what's in here. This page was last edited on 1 November 2022, at 17:35. You are invited to spend an hilarious weekend in the English countryside. Who is the huge spade in the bath? And I'm sitting in this bloody shack and I can't cope with Withnail. Why can't I have an audition? I'll show the lot of you! Danny: Then why's he wearing that old suit? Opened the oven door and it was in there looking at me. [he picks up the kettle on the stove. But no man's put me down yet. They pick up signals from the cosmos and transmit them directly into the brain. Withnail: Danny: Right, now we're going to have to approach this scientifically. Bastard must have died. Flowers are essentially tarts. Withnail: Marwood: I must go home at once and discuss his problems in depth. Withnail: 1 comment. Monty: The movie, which takes place in England in late 1969, involves the misadventures of a pair of chronically unemployed actors. Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E04 High Diving Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E11 Tortoise Beats Hare, [SINGING] Hare Krishna, Hare Lama Hare Krishna, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E08 Water, Water Every Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 1 - S01E37 Frigid Hare, Looney Tunes Golden Collection V.2 - S01E13 Slick Hare. Marwood: [whispering] Well, lick 10 percent of the arses for me, then! I'm in the middle of a bloody overdose! This doesn't go down at all well. DRIVE WITH EXTREME CARE", shouts out of the car window at a man standing on the pavement, Withnail and Marwood are lying in bed together, listening to a man coming inside the cottage. Well, I don't know. "I'm going to pull your head off, because I don't like your head.". Add spice to it. Withnail and I Quotes. By the time the doors opened he was arseholed on rum and got progressively more arseholed until he could take no more and fell over at about 12 o'clock. You don't deserve such loyalty. I dislike relatives in general and in particular mine. Marwood: Why don't you use a cup like any other human being? General: Withnail: Precisely the reason I'm smoking it. Irishman: For some of us a quote becomes a mantra, a goal or a philosophy by which we live. Half an hour? Withnail: A coward you are, Withnail! Oh dear no no No, I'd be sucked into his trap! You lose, you gain. It is the most shattering experience of a young man's life when one morning he awakes and quite reasonably says to himself "I will never play the Dane." So he looks at the Coalman and says, "What's all this? I happen to think the cauliflower more beautiful than the rose. Withnail: Don't threaten me with a dead fish! We get in there and get wrecked, then we eat a pork pie, then we drop a couple of Surmontil-50s each. is the clip Thanks! 2010 Drama 24M views 2 years ago Uncle Monty - the end of an age ohheckforgotusername 157K views 11 years ago Withnail & I 30. These are the best withnail and I quotes. I will say one thing for Monty, he keeps a sensational cellar. You haven't slept in sixty hours, you're in no state to tackle it. Withnail: He leans up close to her, speaking into to her hearing aid]. Hello? Speed, is like a dozen transatlantic flights without ever getting off the plane Time change. What is all this tactical necessity and calculated risk? Find your neutral space. Marwood: [reading the note] It's society's crime, not ours. Free to those that can afford it, very expensive to those that can't. Withnail: Withnail: Monty: What is it? . Marwood: Withnail, you bastard, wake up. Danny: "I'm gonna pull your head off because I don't like your head.". We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Here hare here!" Bruce Robinson, Withnail and I: the Original Screenplay. Anyway, I loathe those Russian plays. Withnail: How should I know where we are? 'S alright, 's alright, s'alright We're going, our car has arrived! They're selling hippie wigs in Woolworths, man. I don't advise a haircut, man. It'll pass. Especially that pimp! Withnail: Tactical necessity. They pick up signals from the cosmos and transmit them directly into the brain. Withnail: Got a randy bull up there. We're not from London! She said she'd closed. Withnail: Jake: Black puddings are no good to us. The wankers don't drink it because they can't afford it. Withnail: But now he's stopped he's much better in our sex life and in our general life." I happened to be looking for a suit for the Coalman two weeks ago. We want to get in there, don't we? Hey, show no fear! I have of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth. Withnail: In that case, "To a delightful weekend in the country.". Marwood: Stop saying that, Withnail, of course he's the f***ing farmer! Withnail: [in a telephone box, speaking to an operator] Monty: You can never, never disguise it. Marwood: I've no idea, I've never met him. Withnail: Good old Jake. Here was a man with 3/4 of an inch of brain who'd taken a dislike to me. Now, which of you is going to be a splendid fellow and go down to the Rolls for the rest of the wine? They are flat broke, so they move to the house of Withnail's uncle in the countryside. Withnail: Danny: I must be ill. Monty: Works the lake, but keep it under your hat, hm? I say, you know what we should do? Withnail: Would it be in bad form to plagiarise a toast? But he's a very low-temperature spade, the Coalman. [ruefully] Hair are your aerials. We've got to get some booze. I really don't want you to. "Oh no, please, don't pull my head off." Marwood: Marwood: Withnail: You've got soup. I'll swallow it and run a mile! Danny: Don't get uptight with me, man. Monty: Yet again that oaf has destroyed my day! This is me naked in a corner! Withnail and I is a 1986 film comedy written and directed by Bruce Robinson and starring Richard E. Grant (Withnail), Paul McGann (Marwood, the "I" of the title), Richard Griffiths (Uncle Monty) and Ralph Brown (Danny). "I'm gonna pull you head off." Sulking up the hill. Scrubbers! Finally, the Withnail And I script is here for all you quotes spouting fans of the Richard E. Grant movie. Marwood: It's those dreadful beady eyes, they stare you out. [Heckles pedestrian] Throw yourself into the road, darling, you haven't got a chance! We're coming back in here. [spits onto the ground] What happened to my cigar commercial? Listen, I know what you're thinking but I had no alternative. You mustn't blame him. I think we'd better release you from the lgumes and transfer your talents to the meat. How like a *god*! Jesus, look at that. [staggering out] Do as he says. Monty: Here hare here! What goods the countryside? I'm preparing myself to forgive you. [cheerfully hopping back over the wall] Here comes another fucker! [reading a newspaper] [Mr Parkin is sitting on his tractor with one leg wrapped from thigh to ankle in a plastic fertiliser bag. Danny: We can't go on like this. Withnail: Weve gone on holiday by mistake. Marwood: move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. Jake: [he pours the lighter fluid down his throat. Be seated. How like an angel, in apprehension how like a god! Stand aside! Are you the farmer? Don't suppose you've engaged, have you? Withnail: The thermostats! Oh, how I tried not to. It'll happen. Marwood: In fact, he'd probably tell you what he was going to do before he did it. We forgot to bring our Wellingtons. Wake up, you bastard or I burn this bastard bed down! Withnail And I - Wikipedia en.m.wikipedia.org. Marwood: Look at us! Withnail: We're incompatible. We'll keep them here til they arrive. Tea Shop Proprietor: The school in fiction Poetry. And soon, I suppose, I shall be swept away by some vulgar little tumour. We shall buy this place and fire you immediately. Withnail: The only people he converses with are his clients and occasionally the police. If you can't find anything, bring in the shed. Listen to me, listen to me! [the man who called Marwood a ponce gets up and walks over to them. Withnail: If I ever see that silage-heap hanging about up here, I'll take the bastard axe to him. Do you mean you've been up here in all this beastly mud and oomska without Wellingtons? He told me that first day you came to Chelsea. Marwood stands there, petrified]. We've just run out of wine. [picking up an apron] Alright, we're going to have to work quickly. Uncle Monty: Sherry? I must go home at once and discuss his problems in depth. The purveyor of rare herbs and proscribed chemicals is back.
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